Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Never thought I'd be this happy to be at home!

   It's been about 4 days back home living with my parents now, ever since The Great Moving Debacle of 2010 ended. As bad/difficult a time I was having before I left, that whole experience put some stuff in perspective. My parents can be insane and impossible at times-but so can I! And at least they love me, and are giving me a place to stay while I figure my shit out, and have given up their whole house practically to become a giant storage unit for all of my stuff-not to mention they buy groceries and DON'T STEAL FROM ME!
   Don't get me wrong, we still have our issues-but I think all families do. Granted, I do think ours can be significantly more abnormal than most, but there have got to be families that are worse, too! It is still a little rough while I'm job searching at the same time my mom is job searching, but setting up the wireless router has really helped with the sharing the one computer issue. My laptop is SO much better and faster, and I can just bring it anywhere in the house that my parents are not located, lol.
   I think I mentioned before that I had a really solid, good interview at a great law firm about a week ago. I got called today to schedule the second and final interview, so it's now set for August 12th at 1:00PM. Now I just have to brush up on my typing and Quickbooks skillz. I'm not too worried about that, though-I'm more worried that one of the other candidates will just have more/better experience that I can't really compete with. But whatever-I made it there, too, right? Obviously they like something about me.
   In the meantime I've been unpacking, exercising, searching for a new therapist, and battling evil fucking insurance companies. Just a day in the life. The unpacking is going really slowly-I just have so much stuff I don't know where to start! I'm def going to eBay or Craigslist my treadmill though, at least that could make me like a few hundred bucks  to keep me going until I'm employed again. Since I joined the gym nearby, don't really need a personal treadmill anymore. I'm also going to be an extra in some random club scene being shot for some commercial...I know, it sounds pretty desperate/lame-but they are paying the extras $200 cash just to smile and look cute in the background. I'll take that ANY day. A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do to make that money, honey.
   I haven't binged/purged in two days now, and I'm trying really hard to stay disciplined and just stick to my meal plan. When I don't eat too much, then I don't have to purge...it's just so much easier said than done. So far today I've had 3 small meals adding up to about 250 cals so far...but I'm going to the gym at 9pm, and I'm going to eat another 80cal before I go to give me some energy, and then I usually have 1/2cup of egg whites when I get back from the gym for the protein, which is another 50cal. So all in all I'll have done around 380-400 today, probably more like 425 if you include the fiber supplements. I'm happy with that-every time I go to the gym I do at least 450cal on the treadmill-more if I can handle it. Last night I stopped at exactly 450 because I was in a rush to get home for Real Housewives of NJ (I know, it's a guilty pleasure)-but the night before I stayed on for 565cals, which I was really proud of. When I'm done with cardio, I always sit in the sauna for 10-15 minutes. I might just be nuts, but I feel like I burn a little more with all that heat and sweating-and it feels really refreshing when you finish.
   There is this little Italian place across the street that my parents really like, and on Mondays and Tuesdays they have a special on Large One-Topping Pizzas for only $5...so unfortunately, every Tuesday without fail, my father brings home a giant cheese pizza. I went downstairs into the kitchen for my last meal around 5:45pm (baby carrots with fat free ranch) and saw the PIZZA and almost fainted. I wanted to eat the ENTIRE PIE sooooooooo badly!!!! I just stood over it, smelling it, breathing in the cheese and the crust for about 5 minutes. Then I pretty much had to pinch myself, close the box, and sit down and eat my carrots. Sometimes eating something healthy can stop me from bingeing, because in my crazy head I think "well if I binge and purge now, I'll also end up purging the carrots, and those are good..." It stopped me this time...but there is still half a pizza in the fridge. I'm really hoping I don't succumb to a midnight binge later...
   OK well I gotta wrap this up if I want to leave for the gym by 9-after going to 4 therapists in the area, I finally found one that I REALLY love...and surprise, surprise--he's the only one my insurance denied. I'm so fed up with calling and arguing with them! Sometimes I genuinely believe that insurance companies and people who work there are pure, unadulterated evil. I've yet to speak with a single person that has shown any sign of possessing human-like qualities such as listening, understanding, or problem-solving. I mean, I know it must suck to work for insurance...but c'mon-they don't all have to be such condescending douchebags. Anyway, if I have to go to one more therapist's office and start completely over again one more time, I'm going to pull my hair out and have a nervous breakdown...and I seriously doubt that I'll find someone better than the doctor I finally settled on. So, despite HAVING mental health insurance that is only a $25 copay for the offices in the network....I'll be paying out of pocket the private rate to stay with this guy. We'll see how this turns out. I agreed to it under the assumption that I'm going to get this job and be working again full time in the next couple weeks and will be able to afford the private rate. If I do not get the job...then I'll have to discontinue sessions until I get another one.
   Alright-I'm off to eat a quick snack and then walk to the gym. Don't worry-I carry mace when I walk alone at night. I'm sure you were definitely concerned about that, lol. Until tomorrow ~


Monday, August 2, 2010


   Now that Real Housewives of NJ is over, I got out my camera from the "electronics" box and took some pics. Still at 104lbs as of...about 20 minutes ago...hopefully that will steadily go down the rest of the week. I've been being so good, sticking to my 50cal meals spread out throughout the day. Like I said, I didn't step foot in a gym while I was away, but since I've been back I've gone each night (making that...two whole nights now) and burned about 600cal last night, and 500cal tonight. It feels good to be back in the gym, so hopefully that will start to show some results.
   After that ridonkulous long post earlier, I'll just keep the rest to the pics for now. I'll save my new therapist search and the EVIL insurance company talk for another time. I've missed the internet and this community SO MUCH! I can't wait to stay up late reading what's been going on with everyone else!


This is my favorite bathing suit. Haven't put it on in a while.

LOL I look really tan but its just an optical (bad lighting) illusion. I wish I were this tan!

The collar bone zone...I think I can see a little bit of a difference.

The Juicy bathing suit test. Still not quite right..actually it looks exactly the same to me.

Juicy FAIL from the side.

That's a WRAP. Goodnight!


Where, Oh Where Could You Be?

   Where indeed. I've actually been going through possibly the worst, most disastrous move in the history of Florida for the past 20ish days. I've had to retell the story about a gazillion times now, and even typed the whole thing out TWICE for complaint reports I had to file...so, I'm not going to get into the ENTIRE thing because it's exhausting EVERY TIME. Basically, I had been pretty much moved out and living at my parents house, but I knew I had to go back to my apartment one more time to get the last of my stuff before the 31st.
   Well, I think I mentioned in an older post that I was having a really hard time adjusting to being back home, pretty miserable time, actually. So, since I had until the 31st on the lease, I decided to just get out of dodge for about 10 days, take my time packing my stuff, relax a little, have time to catch up on some work-related things, and see some friends before moving 5 hours away. Sounds simple enough. When I got there, I found that my roommate had already moved out-despite having told me she would be there until the 30th.
   To my surprise, I also found that she had taken a number of my belongings with her. What belongings? My modem and wireless router were the first things I noticed, as I needed the internet and couldn't get on for some strange reason...oh...my modem and router are gone. My DVD player was also gone, which I had graciously hooked up in the living room instead of my room so that she and her boyfriend could watch movies on the big screen, since she didn't have a DVD player. Interesting...so, I began looking for other things that weren't there. My wireless charger for my Wii Remotes, which her boyfriend had always made comments about being "so cool" and "better than buying batteries," was gone. Also gone was my wireless Wii Remote Sensor that was on top of the TV, which he had also always commented about preferring to his "old one with wires that got in the way." You get the idea. More and more things were missing, all of which I could have taken with me to hook up at my parents place and make my life easier while home-but which I had left JUST for her, so that she could still have wireless internet, watch movies, and play Wii while I was gone.
   What made it even better, was that there weren't just things MISSING. Oh, no-there were also things ADDED. When I had left, I had left maybe a car load of things that needs to be packed...what I returned to was an entire living room and bedroom FULL of crap that I had never seen before. Some of it was useful things...like a completely unopened Foreman grill still in the box, and brand new Crockpot still in the box, and some other random kitchen appliances and new-looking shelving and storage units...but the rest of it was just tons and tons of clothes (ugly ones at that) that weren't my size OR my roommates' size, a ton of maintenance-type things like tools, brooms, mops, nails, crates, and a bunch of broken or really old electronics (printers, ORIGINAL Gameboys, telephones that weren't cordless, etc.)
    It was NUTS. So of course I called the main office and the landlord, thinking maybe the stuff belonged to the new tenant that would be moving in when we left...nope. No one had any idea where the stuff came from. My roommates cell phone number is magically and suddenly disconnected, and she left no forwarding address. I mean...why would she? So now, my expensive and good electronics have been stolen and I am suddenly responsible for removing an entire apartment full of bullshit that isn't mine. The landlord said that it all had to be out, and that since I couldn't prove it wasn't mine, I had to get it all out or face losing my security deposit and additional fees for the apartment complex having to remove it all. So, ya...spent the last 16 days or so making about 3 10-hour drives, and making about 10 trips with FULL carloads to Goodwill, all of which was carried out without any internet access, because my modem and router had been stolen. Awesome.
   Anyway, I finally got everything except a shelving unit and some brooms out by the 31st-which I left in the utility closet as a donation to the next tenants or maintenance staff-whoever wanted it. It was awful, and not the relaxing break from my family I had imagined it would be. But, I am finally back, with internet access, and have replaced most of the items that were taken. Of course, being unemployed at the moment and hunting for a job has left me a little strapped for cash-so thank god for eBay, because I certainly couldn't have payed full retail price to replace that stuff. The Wii shit can wait till I'm working again-not a high priority. But I really needed the wireless router so that I can work on my Macbook and not my parents slow ass PC, so I got a new one of those and set it up yesterday. Pretty much everything I own is in boxes right now, and I'm living like a crazy person.
   Now that that ordeal is behind me, I'm trying to focus on the future and some positives. I had been worried that I would gain weight during the time I was gone, since it meant leaving my 24-hour gym-but as it turned out, all that stress and moving boxes day in and day out left me without much of an appetite, and I managed to get down to 104 again without ever stepping foot in a gym. So that was good. I also had a really great interview with a very good law firm that needs a legal secretary, during the interview I was told by the main Partner that he received over 500 applications, and that he selected only 10 to interview. Out of those 10, only 2 would be called back for a second interview, and obviously one of the two would be given the job. Well, I got called back for a second interview, which will be on August 12th or 13th-depending on his schedule. So, at least I have a 50/50 shot at this.
   During the second interview I think I have to do a typing test-so I'll be brushing up for the next week or two. I mean, my typing skills are fine-more than fine, actually-but I don't want to risk the other person being 10 words per minute faster than me or something and not getting the job because of that. But I'm pretty confident, overall. Just don't want to be overconfident or "put all my eggs in one basket," so to speak-so I'm still sending out resumes to other firms in the area, just in case I don't get this position. I really hope I do though-their pay is very good, plus they have health benefits, and both monthly and year-end bonuses-which really help. OK well it's about 1:45pm now, and I have to run to the library to pick up some Typing Practice CD-Roms and then to the gym before the late afternoon/evening shift starts (I hate the guy that works that shift-try to avoid him, lol). But just so you have an idea of how much STUFF I brought down, in addition to how much I already had...and how small and unequipped my parents' tiny little townhouse is for the volume of belongings I've acquired over the years...I took some pictures. I'll post my regular body and scale shots later tonight when I unpack my camera-but I had already uploaded these from my iPhone, so I thought they were kind of funny/sad.

Formerly the hallway when you first walk in the door to my parents' place

From the other angle.

Formerly part of my parents' den area...note the mystery crock pot that I decided to keep.

The other side of the den

Formerly my parents' living room.

Even took over the small nook behind my dad's recliner

The other corner of the living room.

Behind my parents' couch

My dad's recliner is currently where my bedding is residing. I had a queen size bed at my apartment, but one doesnt fit in my room here, so I'm using a twin and my lovely silk queen sized sheets are chillin on my dad's chair.

Just one of the 4 carloads it took. The entire back seat is packed as high as possible without blocking my back view.

The trunk. Every trip was like this.

Thank god I'm back!